Got out & got back...
You and I were reunited. Finally last Friday. I got a hug. You got one back simultaneously and a big smack on the lips too. He had steered me to an out-of-the-way corner in the parking lot of the restaurant where we had met for these sorts of shenanigans and a meal. You had come down from Genoa after a very necessary barber’s appointment to trim his unruly coiffure and me, having no such need, arrived fresh & unshaven from Codiponte. No Social Distancing for us. And what bravery too. Intimacy with a COVID-19 dottore. Now I read on the BBC about the global health authorities worrying that many folk may carry the virus yet, show no symptoms whatsoever. God help us! My own personal Coronavirus doctor says Social Distancing is The Most Important Measure. There are exceptions apparently, ie the above special encounter. Next is washing hands with soap & water. Masks and gloves are a courtesy, shows responsibility, thinking of others and not just yourself. Of lesser importance.
Feeling frisky… could’ve been the hugs… after a pleasant though short weekend with You, I hit the road yesterday in my scuzzy SUV and drove to Pisa to the IKEA there. Quest for duvet covers and baskets. A glorious day to do so. But first…
a stop at My Preferred Bar for an out-of-Lockdown cappuccino. Having un caffe’ before doing something on your Task List is A Tradition in Italy. And, if possible, a church afterwards to light a candle. Got to cover all critical elements of Life here. I elected not to do the candle thing. The nearest church to My Preferred Bar is a hike to reach and I was on a schedule. The cappuccio was delicious. Since Liberation Day on the 3rd of June, the bar must have submitted before to a good scrub and a clearing-out to within a millimetre of its post-Lockdown Life. No La Nazione newspaper for the Barbanera horroscope. A pity. How can one do anything without celestial input? Virgo is in agitation too. Discovered an enormous but, soundly constructed plexiglass barrier sul banco del bar, and with a small opening to pass your cappuccino to you. Nothing gerry-rigged like at the creepy bank branch I am now obligated to frequent. The consequence of a pre-COVID-19 restructuring. Ample containers of hand gel at the entrance. And, an outdoor piazza with plastic green grass carpets, tables & chairs AND umbrellas to promote the all-important dictates of Social Distancing. Ate up a few parking spaces. Just as well since it contains…. key word… the confusion with how Italians swing a car to STOP for a run into a bar. Spacial sense is not a forte of Italians. Just look at their gardens. Anyway, all good for the bar owner. An amiable chap and was rather glad to see me hobble in. He asked me about my hips. Had something happened during my 3 + 1/2 month absence? I replied it wasn’t really the hips but, too much heavy yard work. He smiled. I paid and resumed my jaunt.
Shook off the lingering sense of Lockdown on the drive South. Wind blowing through the open driver’s window on my bald head, little traffic and very few trucks, the SUV humming along as I watched the autostrada and occasionally admired the stunning sky-scapes above the Apuane Mtns. & Apennines. Rarely do I see such monumental cloud constructions and of every type on the chart. High above was this extraordinary azure sky. A crystalline clear blue. One reminding me Italy is on the same latitude as Toronto, Canada… more or less, a Northern sky.
I went to McDonald’s. It’s in IKEA’s neighbourhood. Sorrowful one too. Huge boxes for buildings with vast parking lots next door to wildernesses of tall weeds and partially completed construction sites. More huge boxes to come. Scenes from post-WWII movies of Neorealismo Italiano. IKEA is the most visible. However, the Double Golden Arches beckoned me to come hither for a double cheeseburger… the pickle slapped on cheese and a beef patty, we think, is a capping glory of fast-food architecture… a large French Fries and a Coke Zero. Yellow tape on the pavement showed me where I could stand outside in line to enter for proper Social Distancing, hand-gel and groovy Italian Blu plastic gloves were provided. Few folk inside. There, mostly to place their orders for delivery to their tables outside. Is this an Italian invention? Service to your table at a Mac’s? Seems un-fast-food-ish…
back when il Poggiolo was under construction and when the builder had finished the complex of new roofs, he asked if I was intending to host a meal to celebrate. Had never heard of that but, thought it a great idea. My English Friend in Codiponte confirmed the local Topping-off the New Roof Party custom. I whipped up lots of stuff to eat… from torte salate to una pasta calda to un dolce. On the appointed day, the builder, his crew of 6 and a few privileged guests showed up around 5 in the afternoon on a pleasant early October day to partake della festa. I made a little speech of thanks and then, invited the assembled to serve themselves. No one moved. I re-issued the invitation to please go to the buffet table on the Loggia and help yourself. Still no one moved. My English Friend quietly stepped over and whispered to me… Gli italiani non si servono da mangiare ad una festa. Dovresti farlo tu! So, I climbed up to the Loggia and started piling food onto plates and handing them out. Suddenly, I had 15 people clamouring to be the first. McDonald’s has had to do the same, I suppose.
Done with eating, I drove over to IKEA, parked in the D for Dog lot of cars and walked over to the Entrance. A masked & gloved employee in a dark Blue combat style uniform came up to me holding what looked like a gun. We exchanged Buon Giorno’s… mine was forceful yet, with a tinge of reticence… while the young man pointed what looked like a gun at my forehead, a bright red light lit up like a laser tag, and where a bullet might have shot out. All I got for the sudden fright was a… Okay, si puo entrare… or, You’re good to go. Grazie. Off I trotted to the separate Linen and Basket Departments. What a mess. People everywhere, scurrying about with their carts or, yellow carrier-bags or, not, and blocking aisles where I needed to go. Social Distancing was a Bump & Grind. Dottore You would have been appalled. I was. Then what? Could not find what I had in mind from the last visit to IKEA four months ago. Stock was upside down, topsy-turvy, out of regimental order or, non-existent. The store must’ve liquidated their personnel during Lockdown. No one was about. Certainly, there wasn’t anyone visible to put the place back into some semblance of order. THERE ARE RULES FOR DISPLAY!!! I used to work in retail. I know. I debated various possible candidates for both single & double duvet covers. Cancelled most for being too expensive. Euro 80 for a piece of fake linen in cotone? You would have had my head if he knew. Then, he called. Must’ve sensed I was going to spend Euro’s. I explained. He suggested No. I said OK. He rang off. Shoved into the bright yellow carrier bag one single and one double to try them out and headed with Hope for better luck in the Basket Department. Dinky things. Miserable selection. Anxious to leave… consumer disappointment can be difficult to bear, if unexpected OR, unwanted… I picked up two 50’s looking basket things I discovered later were too small for holding even 1/10th of our pillow archive at il Poggiolo. Fled to the self-service cash stand… and without picking up more stuff which had caught my fancy… used a laser gun similar to the one previously seen to scan my scanty purchases, paid, left. D for Dog. Whew!!! Oh, well… I may have to shop Maison du Monde. The French competition. Mais oui!!! At least, I got out. Had a caffe’. Ate a burger. Enjoyed the views. Arrived safe & sound. Home Sweet Home? Yes! The Joys of Lockdown? Well, I’m not sure I’d go that far but, there’s certainly Peace & Tranquility and one very happy Puppy waiting to have me back home again. The drive was nice.