Heat purification…

This won’t be polite…

20150630_115920_resizedIt’s so hot here. What makes it unbearable is the humidity. I feel like I am being steamed to perfection to become an Italian antipasto. All I would need is a bit of olive oil. Perhaps balsamic vinegar too. This is not an appropriate Fate for someone hailing from the dry-climate State of Colorado, far, far away from heat-wave inflicted Italy.

Astounding the number of costume changes in the span of My Sixteen Hour Days. T-shirts stained beyond recognition. The art of Helen Frankenthaller has nothing on me and my sweat. Yes, I sweat. Sweat a storm. Big storm. I sweat just sitting on the Loggia sipping ice-filled glasses of white wine with grapefruit juice. Drips pour to the floor while I try to fathom the Greek/EU Situation off the lap-top. I know how I would VOTE on this coming Sunday’s referendum. Does anyone? I say… Ο Θεός να σώσει τον Ελληνικό Λαό.

But, back to sweating… it becomes dire if I move. Doing stuff kicks my pores into Sweat Over-drive. Recent In-the-100+-Degree-Heat Tasks have been: rebuilding the cane thatching over the Fish Pond so no more little fishies-wishies won’t be found floating belly-up as in days past. Burials are in the hydrangea border below… watering the same so they too won’t be seen going belly-up by passing neighbors, which is quite a trick for a flowering plant… spraying verde rame on all the roses, as per You’s Commands via his incessant telephone text-messages. He’s a doctor, saving people’s eyes-sight through surgery. How does he have time to punch the keys on a cellphone all the time, hmmm? Mystery of Modern Medicine? It will remain so… and doing about 20 loads of laundry after an excruciatingly short stay of ONLY 2 nights by an American family from Michigan… they drove from Detroit to Toronto to save on the airfares!!!!!!!… and, simultaneously, a couple of adored young-cousins in from Minnesota on their honeymoon. Happy to see the changing-residence-every-two-days Americans head for one of the most preposterous tourist locals in all of Italy… Le Cinque Terre. It warrants a separate post. Very sad to see My Cuzs fly off on DELTA from Pisa’s Galileo Galilei International Airport to JFK & MSP and Home.

What all this means is the sweat I produce in abundance stays on my skin. I have a mighty heat-rash. Add that to the manifestations of constant sun poisoning… more red bumps… and heat-prostration and you got someone to look at… Me!!!… who resembles a poster-child for some horrific and unidentified sub-tropical jungle disease!!! I am miles away from those icky places. Lord, help me.

What could the remedy be? Zolfo. Sapone di zolfo. Sulphur soap. Soap made from sulphur sounds better. I purposely drove a half-hour this morning to buy a gigantic never-run-out quantity of sapone di zolfo. I came home and took a cleansing shower with said soap. However, it is not encouraging to read on the label that the product is for oily and impure skin. HELL!!! What’s fatty and impure about me? I’m an Anglo-Saxon whose skin was never designed to withstand prettily the combo of high temps and mugginess!!! Gads.

6 thoughts on “Heat purification…

  1. Oh, Dear Forrest,
    You sound sooo miserable. Since it is so hot and humid make some lemonaide out of that lemon weather you’re having and start some hot yoga classes for the village. The saying is: It’s not the heat it’s the humidity! Otherwise, do the Italians drink iced tea? What better way to survive the heat as we do here in the south. Take care.
    Warm Regards,

  2. Pat, Pat, Pat… my pal!!! How terrific to hear from you. Gosh. I am nearly as overwhelmed by your surprise as I am by the heat. Don’t tell anyone but, I am sitting on my loggia sipping a huge ice-filled glass of white wine with nearly no clothes on!!! Warm regards back at you. Please send me your telephone number. Roberto and I will be in Atlanta for a weekend-long party to celebrate my sister’s 25th wedding anniversary from the 11th until the 13th. Our hosts, Don & Betsy Alexander, want to throw us a brunch for friends on that Sunday and I would adore it if you and yours could come! Love, Forrest

  3. Oh Forrest,
    What exciting news that you and YOU are coming to town. I want to see ya’ll and come to the brunch. Do email me the details and call me when you get here. Best number is the office/home 404-875-6837. If we aren’t in leave a message.(I could be just outside tending my veggie garden). This is so exciting, that I’m going to see you after all these years.
    Till the weekend of the 11th, take care and stay cool as possible.
    Luv, Pat

  4. Hi… I want to send you an email invitation for the brunch at Don & Betsy Alexander’s house but any email I sent you gets bounced back. Do you have another email address? More than hot here. Killer heat. Love, Forrest

  5. Dear Forrest,
    Just saw this reply tonight. I don’t have another email address, don’t know why it’s bouncing back. Check that spelling. I’ve gotten other emails from you before.
    Perhaps I should try to give you a ring on Skype.

  6. Hi… all my emails come unceremoniously bounced back. Why I do not know. But know this… Betsy Alexander is hosting a brunch for Roberto & me on Sunday, the 13th of September, at 11:00AM, If you can come, and I hope you can, please give her a call at 404-271-8426 to RSVP. She and her husband Don live at 1629 Rainier Falls Dr. N.E. It’s off Houston Mill from La Vista, practically in your neighbourhood unless you have changed digs. And do me the favour to confirm that you have received this message. OK? Love, Forrest

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